Nostalgia: Remembering Mark Rathnayake

I first met Mark fourteen years ago while I was serving as an Assistant Pastor with the Assemblies of God of Ceylon at a church in Colombo. At that time, Mark was a Lieutenant Commander in the Sri Lanka Navy. Although we came from vastly different backgrounds, we quickly developed a meaningful friendship that transcended our differences. Mark saw me as more than just a friend; he considered me a mentor and confidant. Over the years, we shared countless conversations that deepened our connection. We talked about faith, personal challenges, and the ups and downs of life. These discussions were not just exchanges of words; they were moments of genuine connection that helped both of us grow. I felt honoured to walk alongside him during significant moments in his journey, and our bond grew stronger as we navigated life together, supporting one another in times of need.

Tragically, Mark’s life was cut short on October 22, 2021, when he was called home to be with the Lord following a devastating car accident. His sudden loss was a profound shock, serving as a painful reminder of how fragile life can be. The grief of losing someone so dear to me was overwhelming, leaving a deep void in my heart. In sharing this post, my hope is to keep Mark’s memory alive while honouring the incredible impact he had on my life and the lives of others. Mark was a blessing to many, always offering kindness, wisdom, and support. I will forever cherish the moments we shared together and the lessons we learned. His legacy of friendship, faith, and compassion will never be forgotten, and I strive to carry those values forward in my own life, ensuring that his spirit continues to inspire others. [In Pic: Mark and me at church in the year 2021]

He helped me recover my Calling

When my marriage ended four years ago, it felt like a devastating blow to my calling as a Pastor. I struggled with feelings of disqualification and shame, which led me to step away from ministry. During this time, I was grappling with my own challenges while trying to navigate the emotional fallout from my marriage. Mark, a dear friend and a Lieutenant Commander in the Sri Lanka Navy, was also going through his fair share of difficulties. Despite knowing about my failed marriage, he continued to seek my advice and direction. Mark never judged or criticized me for my situation. Instead, he expressed gratitude after our conversations, sharing that he felt blessed each time we spoke. His unwavering support and trust in me during my lowest moments reminded me of the importance of friendship and understanding in times of struggle, allowing me to gradually regain my sense of purpose.

Mark’s attitude and resilience inspired me to reclaim my calling as a Pastor. Through our conversations, I discovered three vital lessons about my vocation that changed my perspective. First, I learned that my calling to Christian service is determined by the grace of God, not by societal standards or personal failures. Second, I realized that God can use me for His glory and the well-being of others, even amidst my brokenness. Lastly, I understood the importance of being ready to minister to the brokenhearted, regardless of my own struggles. These lessons reshaped my understanding of ministry, encouraging me to embrace my imperfections while still serving others. Mark’s unwavering faith in me not only helped me recover my calling but also deepened my commitment to support others facing their own challenges.

He wasn’t ashamed to seek Help

Mark was a bright student and an alumnus of a prestigious school in Colombo, later graduating from the renowned General Sir John Kotelawala Defence University. He was undoubtedly one of the most intelligent individuals I have ever encountered. Mark was happily married to a beautiful woman and seemingly had everything one could desire. However, what stood out most was his remarkable humility; he lacked the prideful attitude often associated with successful men in his position. This was evident from the heartfelt comments left by his superiors, colleagues, and subordinates on his Facebook timeline after his passing. They spoke of his kindness, wisdom, and ability to connect with others, highlighting the positive impact he had on their lives. Mark’s humility made him a truly exceptional individual who was not defined by his achievements but by his character and the genuine relationships he cultivated throughout his life.

Above all, Mark chose to seek counsel for his problems rather than maintaining a façade of perfection. He was so humble that he willingly trusted the guidance of a young Pastor like me, despite having the option to consult someone more experienced. This choice was both inspiring and challenging for me, as I often struggle with my own pride and find myself concealing my problems instead of seeking help. Mark’s actions taught me that it is not embarrassing to ask for assistance; in fact, it is a sign of strength and wisdom. His example encouraged me to be more open about my own struggles and to recognize that everyone faces challenges, regardless of their circumstances. Seeking help is a smart decision that leads to growth and healing, and Mark’s legacy will continue to remind me of this important lesson.

Mark was the epitome of Simplicity

The dictionary defines simplicity as “the state of being simple, uncomplicated, or uncompounded,” which perfectly describes Mark in many ways. He embraced life’s simple pleasures, enjoying a modest snack with me every Sunday when he came to church. His favourite treat was the Lime juice served at the church cafeteria—just a blend of lime juice diluted with water and sweetened with sugar. Despite having the means to enjoy the finest things in life, Mark found joy in these uncomplicated moments. Each sip of that Lime juice brought him happiness, showcasing his appreciation for the little things. Mark’s contentment with simplicity served as a reminder that fulfilment doesn’t always come from extravagance; it can be found in everyday experiences that bring us joy and connection. His ability to find happiness in simplicity was truly admirable and reflected a depth of character that many aspired to emulate.

Mark was a man of authority, yet he never felt the need to assert his presence or dominate conversations. His identity was not tied to his position or material possessions; rather, it stemmed from his kindness and genuine nature. He was always polite, greeting everyone with a warm smile that instantly put others at ease. Mark’s humility and approachability made him a beloved figure among his peers, friends, and family. His simple interests and down-to-earth demeanour endeared him to many, creating a sense of comfort and camaraderie. I am certain he will be deeply missed by his family, the church community, and the Sri Lanka Navy. Mark taught me that authenticity is a powerful trait and that sometimes, the little things can mean the most. His legacy of simplicity and genuine connection will continue to inspire those who knew him, encouraging us to appreciate life’s small joys.

Farewell Mark:

As Mark Knopfler beautifully sang, “Let me bid you farewell [because] every man has to die” sooner or later. In this moment of reflection, we come together to honour and remember the extraordinary man you were, knowing that your legacy will remain etched in our hearts for the rest of our lives. Your presence brought joy, wisdom, and warmth to everyone fortunate enough to know you. Although you may no longer be physically present, the impact you made continues to resonate deeply within us. We will carry forward the lessons you taught us and cherish the moments we shared, ensuring that your spirit remains alive in our lives. Each story we tell and every memory we hold dear serves as a reminder of your kindness, strength, and unwavering faith. While your physical presence is no longer with us, your legacy will endure, inspiring us to embrace life fully and to honour your memory.

It’s often said that “the only time goodbye is painful is when you know you’ll never say hello again.” The pain of your departure is profound, especially knowing that you left us far too soon and still had so much more to give. Every day without you feels incomplete, and the void you’ve left is immeasurable. Yet, amidst the sorrow, I hold on to the hope that one day we shall greet each other once more. Until that day arrives, I find comfort in your memory, cherishing the laughter, deep conversations, and shared experiences we enjoyed together. Your influence will always be a guiding force in my life, reminding me to appreciate the little moments and to uplift others just as you did. Rest in peace, my dear brother from another mother. Your spirit will continue to inspire and uplift those of us left behind until we reunite in a place where goodbyes are no longer necessary.

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